The Golf Report: Happy Father's Day!.....Member Guest a huge success…..Bud 8 loses in league debut……Haluska loses to the Ultras again!!!!!!!

The Golf Report Report being written at 38,000 feet

This report comes to you from the mobile office of The Golf Report 38,000 feet in the air aboard Southwest Airlines flight 854 from Fort Lauderdale to Chicago. The captain has turned on the fasten seat belt sign and the beverage service has been suspended due to turbulence.

Mother Nature has been actively involved on Tuesday nights this year but Supper League must go on even if it was a hot night with cattle warnings issued in Carroll County.

Your Michelob Ultra team fell to second place Carpet One Floor and Home 5.5 to 4.5 and still sits atop the Supper League. Long time subscriber, former top local, highly successful and very veteran golfer Craig Mertz once again beat the boy in a close one! Better luck next time Nater! Bud Three Steve Hans Auen the only other winner for the Ultras beating Shellie’s husband Sean who was sending taunting texts prior to the league to this publisher. This behavior has continued on from the member guest shenanigans of the Happy Haluska Boys. This marks twice now that SH has subbed and faced the Ultra team. Clearly, if someone needs to call him to sub they better check who their opponents are because his nerves just can’t handle such above-referenced competition. The head carpet remnant Colin Bierl beat Bud Two Troy Auen. Brad Hempstead topped the recent 2022 Kuemper Catholic graduate and newest member of the Ultra team Tyler, Big Country, Smalls, Auen. He has more nicknames than points he has scored for Supper’s League's most popular team. Security Mike Schulz was unavailable for action as he was enjoying a procedure at St. Anthony Regional Hospital that is recommended for those of us around the age of 50. CK Curt Kirsch requested an excused absence so he could spend some quality time with Kimmy! The Ultra team remains 2.5 strokes ahead of the flooring company who now offers electric fireplaces. One has to wonder where Commercial Savings Bank’s safety deposit box director Kevin Milligan was. It does take a tole losing to the bank CFO time and time again. Sources tell this report that he may have even scheduled a vacation to avoid squaring off with the Long time subscriber, former top local, highly successful and very veteran golfer Craig Mertz.

HD of Carroll clobbered Supper’s League most mature team Stick Sticks sending the sticks into dead last. This is the lowest standing in team history! Larry Doc Sporrer was the only point getter for the sticks getting one point from no one as the cycles played one Harley down! Wild Wade Adams and Head Hog Terry Ruchti were winners for the cycles. The Stiff Sticks has scheduled a team meeting to evaluate their future so this report will be sure to provide updates on that meeting. Bud One Jim Auen will have a very well-organized spreadsheet available I am sure.

Champion Ford barely squeezed the juice out Graddy’s Tomatoes 6.5 to 4.5. Josh Sporrer and Farmer Boy Clint Cummings beat Tomato John and Dr. Decay for the cars. Tyler Putney tied Tator Tot Tim Gute. A sub from the famous Pettitt stable of golfers Jace Pettitt was the only winner for the Tomatoes.

Everyone likes Tator Tots!

Full Swing Golf blanked Kasperbauer Cleaners who appeared to forget that Supper League was still on Tuesday nights. John and Drew Munson, Brett Pietig and Ryan Lynch were all winners for the swingers. Maybe the cleaners need to add a team recurring calendar reminder to remind them that the league is on Tuesday nights.

Sharp Funeral battled to a pillow fight tie with Anytime Fitness. Numbers Bob Muhlbauer and Windstar’s backup bus driver Pat Greteman beat BV Brandon Vonnahme and Badding Constructions head nail puller Tony Badding respectively. One of Papa Joe’s boys Adam beat the head casket himself Kyle Atkinson. This report will anticipate a well thought excuse about why he lost. Austin Scott was also a winner for the gym rats. Speaking of Papa Joe where is he at? The last time he was seen by this report he was just south of the four green at the Carroll Municipal Golf Course discussing life events with The Legend Joel Harris.

Champion Chrysler played one cylinder down and drove all over OH BOBBY 7 to 1. Monument Man Loren Boyce, Clothier Wade Wilkie and Koster(could not read Brian’s writing) were all winners for the car company. Mike Soe the only point getter for OH BOBBY. Losers included Easy Ed Cutler, Brian Widdell and Dr. Ron Cheney.

Westside State Savings Bank topped The Carroll Glass Company. The Glass Company’s recent slide in the standings brings into question the motivation that team Captain Jon Heim is bringing to the team. Head Teller Bick Beck, Karl Christensen and Matty Boy Fleshner were all winners for the bankers while the head glass cutter himself Andy Reiman was the only winner for the plate glasses. John Heim provided no after match comments to explain the team's performance(mainly I guess because this publisher was basking in the sun in the Dominican Republic).

Drew Munson and Craig Mertz shared the low gross on the front 9 with even par rounds of 37.

Wild Wade Adams was the low net individual on the back nine with a nice round of 42.

Tator Tot Tim Gute was the low gross individual on the back nine with a one over par round of 35.

Burnt Tator Tot and Tyler Putney shared back nine honors for low net.

Nebraska Nate Mertz who lost again to his Dad knocked it closest on #8

Josh Sporrer was closest to the pin on 17

Jon Heim did something for the team and nailed the longest putt on #9(still lost his match)

No Name sunk the longest putt on 18.

Supper League Standings!

A big shout out to the committee, Carroll Country Club staff, grounds crew and membership for hosting a very successful member guest tournament that was enjoyed by all! Thanks to the Lidderdale Country Store and Baratta’s Catering for providing the food.