Wednesday, May 30, 2018

State Champions Kuemper Knights........Papa Joe catches a big one.............Member - Guest this weekend!

Mother nature cancelled golf league on Tuesday night with some much needed rain. More coverage from the Carroll Country Club next week.

28.5" 10 lb catch for Papa Joe


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State Champions Kuemper Knights! 
The state championship trophy was on display at the CCC on Friday night!

Congratulations to Coach Brian Billmeir on his 1st State Championship!





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Good luck Carroll High Girls!

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Day Two - Somer's spectators - Dad Steve, Sister Shay and Brother Alek
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Grandpa Bruce Sinnard cheering on Somer at state golf! 
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Somer's grandma's Sue and Sandy watching their favorite CHS golfer!
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Good luck Kuemper Girls Golf Team!

Congrats to the all the area golf teams. 

Fairway and Greens to all 
Mike 

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

Happy Memorial Day.......Carroll and Kuemper golf teams on to State.....Belated birthday to Papa Joe.........Schultes scores first win!

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It was a beautiful night for Men's Supper League at the Carroll Country Club! The course is in great condition!
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The defending champions, Bierl Carpet One continued their strong play with a 8 to 0 shut out of Kasperbauer Cleaners. Both Brad Pick and Colin Bierl won on the last hole. It looks like a great move by team captain Colin Bierl benching the tallest red head Kevin Milligan and bringing in two of Papa Joe's boys, Adam and Brad Pick! No losers for the champions. All losers for the cleaners including the tall lanky plumber himself Wyatt Haukap.

Your Michelob Ultra team scraped out a victory over Chico Kanne's Community Oil 6 to 3.5. Security Schulz beat Jerry Janson. Your Ultra team drove a loaner car from Champion Ford in the form of Tony Schultes to victory. It was Schultes's first league win! Schultes has been at Champion Ford for 20 years. Thanks for subbing and certainly thanks for winning. Mouthpiece Mike Franey tied the head oil jobber Chico Kanne with a chip in from the bunker on the final hole. Country Stores Steve Kimmes handled Bud Two Troy Auen. Steve Sinnard was still painting the garage for graduation, long time subscriber, top local amateur, highly successful and more veteran golfer Craig Mertz was playing Super Softball Dad and Bud Three Han Auen was in Margaritaville with Jimmy Buffett.

Champion Ford #2 beat the Mid Iowa Team 7 to 3. Junkyard Cuda Quandt was beaten like a drum by two time Papa Joe Classic Champion Denny Kasperbauer. Aaron Ahrendsen the only winner for Mid Iowa beat John Barratta. Papa Joe Pick had no thought for his team as he took off fishing to Colorado.
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Cuda Quandt was a little lost without golf mate Papa Joe Pick. Terry Ruchti tried to console the lost dog!

The Sharp Funeral Home destroyed Oh Bobby 10 to 0. Chad Kanne beat Easy Ed Cutler. A post match interview with team captain Brian Widdell indicates that the team is just drafting and waiting for the time to pass the field. Team Member Mike Soe said "The Best is Yet to Come" as Easy Ed starting singing the song. This publisher ended the interview at that point. 

Champion Ford #1 turned the water off at the Highway 30 Car Wash. The car wash has the head Nurse, Jim Nurse in the lineup. Nurse tied Brad Woodard. Clint Cummings and Monument Man Loren Boyce were winners for the Fords. Car Wash Todd Pettitt the only winner for the washes. 

Carroll's most mature team Stiff Sticks were beaten by CTS 5 to 3. Magic Trusty Mike Nelson the only winner for the sticks. 

Carroll Glass smashed the tomatoes of Graddy's 5 to 3. Lidderdale Country Store's Brad Stork the only winner in the match. All three other matches ended in a tie. 

Low Gross and low net on the front 9 - Head Golf Professional Paul Tigges
Low Gross back nine - Aaron Ahrendsen
Low Net back nine - Denny Kasperbauer
Closest to the pin on #8 - the first ever tie for a flag prize Jamming Joe Hinners and Jerry Janson
Closest to the pin #17 John Gretsky Greteman
Long Putt #9 Tony Schultes 
Long Putt #18 Farmer Nick Schon

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State Qualifier Somer Sinnard and proud MOM Keeley! 



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Congratulations to the Carroll High Tigers Girls Golf Team! 
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Congratulations Kuemper Catholic Knights and Coach Brian Billmeir - ON TO STATE!
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Congrats Nate Mertz, Jared Tigges and Sam Auen on to State! 
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Congratulations Kuemper Catholic Knights Girls Golf Team on to State! 
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Congratulations Sam, Jared and Nate
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Happy Birthday to my Grandpa Dave Nelson! Now give me a cracker!
Mr. Publisher why did you forget my Papa's birthday? He was 68 years old on May 16th. Thanks Evan! 

A few tee times remain for the Member - Guest. Great gift options will be available to all players. It is it like you are getting paid to play.


Just saying.....

  • This report is glad that Nebraska finally won something...Miss USA! 
  • Iowa wins American Idol! 
  • Happy Birthday to my step son Payton White! 
  • Welcome new subscribers Chuck Svensson and Tony Schultes
Fairways and greens

Mike



Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Fun night....good luck Kuemper boys and girls and Carroll High girls.....Happy Birthday Keeley Sinnard!



It was a beautiful night for the Men's Supper League. The results of the net skins game are as follows:

  • Jon Renze - net 3 on 1 and net 2 on 9
  • Jamie North net 2 on 5 and net 2 on 8
  • Mike Schulz net 3 on 7
  • Loren Boyce net 3 on 12
  • Mike Nelson net 3 on 12
  • Brad Woodard net 2 on 17
Report Correction: Easy Ed Cutler beat Mike Schulz last week. The report incorrectly said that they did tie. This is the first reported typo in the report's 42,370 views. An undisclosed out of court settlement has been reached in this matter. 

Quote of the Week: "This report might not be Fake News but it might not always be true" This publisher has no problem with that quote! 



A great night at the I-Club Banquet! 

The home and away voice of the Iowa Hawkeyes

Happy Birthday Keeley Sinnard! 
Welcome new subscriber, Mike Soe!

Fairways and greens, 

Mike 

Things to remember: 

It is our turn to take a trip to the Grinnell College Golf Course and challenge their membership to an Inter Club Match. We will be leaving the CCC parking lot on the morning of May 24th at 8:30 in the morning. We welcome anyone who may want to travel to join us for this event. If you have never played in these matches before they are extremely fun! To register please call the Golf Shop at 792-1255 or email golfshop@carrollcountryclub.com. The cost for Golf and Lunch at the course is $25 per player. We would like to get at least 20 players if possible!!

Don't forget to sign up the Member - Guest on June 1st and 2nd.

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

Happy Mother's Day....Carroll Glass surges to top.......Pick rallies to tie Franey......Red Heads benched and Mertz spanks the Dog!




Finally Mother Nature did not play a role in the Men's supper league at the Carroll Country Club. It was a perfect night for a showdown for your Michelob Ultra team with the most famous golf couple Steve "Cuda" Quandt and Papa Joe Pick. Papa Joe Pick rallied to win the last two holes to tie Ultra captain Mike Franey. Pick was seen doing his version of the happy dance after snaking in a 20 foot putt for the tie. It took most of the back nine for long time subscriber, top local amateur, highly successful and more veteran golfer Craig Mertz to finally get the choke chain on the Junkyard Dog. Mertz started three over in the first three holes which included a towering drive on #13 that landed forty rows into the field.  Security Mike Schulz tied new report subscriber Easy Ed Cutler and Bud Three Steve Hans Auen tied Aaron Ahrendson despite AA's one under par 33. Michelob Ultra beat the Mid Iowa Team 6 to 4 with the help of long time subscriber, top local amateur, highly successful and more veteran golfer Craig Mertz's two flag prizes.
Win or lose life is always good playing with these 3. 

Over the weekend on course reporters spotted a former Carroll resident in town. Welcome back Duffer!


Reality hit the defending champions of Bierl Carpet One as they were neutralized by OH BOBBY! John Sturm and Colin Bierl were winners over Brian Widdel and Rich Hartley. The real damage was done by Mike Soe and Chris Gigure who beat Kevin Milligan and Brad Hempstead. In an exclusive interview for this report team captain Colin Bierl revealed that the two red heads have been benched for next week and the former champs will be looking for subs. Bold move from Captain Bierl!

Champion Ford #2 were missing in action as Carroll Glass trounced them 10 to 1. Reiman, Feldman, Heim and Nepple were all winners. The only point for the Fords was a long putt on #9 by Brad Woodard. Team owner Darrin Putney was unavailable for comment following the match.

Computer Concepts beat Highway 30 Car Wash 5 to 3. Head washer Todd Pettitt was the MVP for the wash. Scott Quam and John Munson were winners for the computers.

It was a big night for the Westside State Savings Bank! The bankers foreclosed on America's most mature team Stiff Sticks 6 to 2. Corey Bluml used his low gross 34 to beat former 215 Applewood Drive resident Bud One Jim Auen. Fairway Frank Comito the only winner for the sticks.

Champion Ford #1 beat CTS 7 to 1. Darrin Putney was low gross with a one under par 33 winning a score card playoff with Aaron Ahrendson. CTS enjoyed lots of beer during the match in their support of the Ike Auen Distributing Company.

Community Oil grabbed their first win of the season taking care of Graddy's Tomatoes 6 to 2. Dave Nelson was the only winner for the tomatoes. Todd Kanne put together his best round of the year to beat Tomato John Gradoville. Head oil jobber Chico Kanne and Jerry Janson were both winners.
Even Jack knows your handicap is inflated Jewels!

Kasperbauer Cleaners scored their first win of the year beating the Sharp Funeral Home. No sign of Chad Kanne, Jewels Mike Eckerman or Casket Kyle Atkinson for the funerals. Michael Kasperbauer and Wyatt Haukap suffered a bigger then normal loss in after golf at the hands of numbers Bob Muhlbauer and Peterman Tony Pietig.

Standing through week 3



Other points of interest................
Congrats to Somer Sinnard, back to back conference medalist and the Carroll Tigers for winning the conference meet. 


Over 450 hawkeye fans will invade Arcadia tonight for the annual spring banquet
Congrats to Dale Jr and wife Amy on their new little girl! #JRNATION
Don't forget the Member - Guest, Grinnell Inter Club match and the Carroll Am are coming up soon
That's a wrap

Fairways and greens!

Mike

Thursday, May 3, 2018

Mother Nature shows up again.......players needed.......defending champs on fire!





Mother Nature held off for a little while in week 2 of Men’s Supper League at the Carroll Country Club. Most matches were finished although some deals were made so some player results are not available to this report.

The Defending champions Bierl Carpet One completed their second shutout in a row to stay on top of the league. The Carpets robbed the Westside State Savings Bank 8 to 0. Sturm, Bierl, Brad Pick, and Brandon Schimmer all winners for the hot team of the league. 

Your Michelob Ultra team bounded up the standings with at 7 to 2 victory over Graddy’s Tomatoes. Bud Three Hans Auen and Security Mike Schulz smashed the tomatoes of Rick Grote and Dave Nelson. Tomato John Gradoville and Dr. Decay Nick Fangman tied their matches with Bud Two Troy Auen and long time subscriber, top local amateur, highly successful and more veteran golfer Craig Mertz. 
Steve Sinnard was out of action painting his garage for the upcoming graduation of daughter Somer who will be attending the University of Iowa!


 The Sharp Funeral Home closed the casket on the Highway 30 Car Wash. The head PXG princess Kyle Atkinson led the way for the funeral home. Tony Pietig was also a winner for the caskets. A subbing Mike Franey and John Greteman scored victories for the car wash. 
Mike Eckerman rented a Uhaul from the Highway 30 Car Wash to haul is over inflated extremely large PXG induced hanicap around.


Stiff Sticks trampled the oil jobbers of Community Oil 10 to 2. Magic Mike Nelson was the MVP for the most mature team. Head oil jobber Chico Kanne has to be scratching his head about his team early season slump. 

Champion Ford #1 and Carroll Glass had a two golfer pillow fight. 6 to 2 glass company wins. 

CTS beat OH BOBBY 5 to 3 with Jon Renze and John Nepple leading the way.

Champion Ford # 2 cleaned the cleaners of Kasperbauer Cleaners 6 to 3. Woodard, Cummings and Denny Kasperbauer all winners for the car lot. Team sponsor Michael Kasperbauer the only winner for dry cleaners.

Mid Iowa Team beat Computer Concepts 6 to 2. It was a romantic reunion for the club's most famous couple Papa Joe Pick and Steve "Cuda" Quandt after the snow bird finally returned from the sunshine in Arizona. Pick, Quandt and Aaron Ahrendson were all winners. Rumor has it that Cuda is going to meet up Tom Duffer Duff this weekend to play golf. 

Front Nine Low Gross and Low net - Mike Nelson
Back Nine Low Gross - Casket Kyle Atkinson powered by PXG
Back Nine Low Net - Mike Franey
Closest to the Pin #8 - Bud Three Steve "Hans" Auen
Closest to the Pin #17 - Pete Juergens - only took like 7 years off from golf
Long Putt #18 Tony Pietig

Week 2 standings



 
It is our turn to take a trip to the Grinnell College Golf Course and challenge their membership to an Inter Club Match. We will be leaving the CCC parking lot on the morning of May 24th at 8:30 in the morning. We welcome anyone who may want to travel to join us for this event. If you have never played in these matches before they are extremely fun! To register please call the Golf Shop at 792-1255 or email golfshop@carrollcountryclub.com. The cost for Golf and Lunch at the course is $25 per player. We would like to get at least 20 players if possible!!

Don't forget to sign up the Member - Guest on June 1st and 2nd. This is a great time to showcase our course. FBI back ground checks and Carroll Police clearance was received today so....drum roll please.....John Dukes is coming to town! 

Meet the Hawkeye's next week. Let me know if you would like tickets.


Fairways and Greens 
Mike