The Golf Report: Relay For Life.....Carpet One Rolls Again....Bud Light records shut out.....club tourney weekend

This Friday June 27th at the Carroll Stadium many will emerge to walk around the track to fight a disease that has affected all of us. Stop down and show your support!

This weekend is the annual Carroll Country Club Tournament. Get your foursome and call the pro shop to sign up. There will be an auction on Friday night with the Mouthpiece Auction Company in charge.

Your Bud Light Team bounced back from the worst loss in team history to stall the motors of Wittrock Motors in a 10 to 0 shut out. Long time subscriber, top local amateur, highly successful and more veteran golfer Craig Mertz beat Dr. Dave Nystrom. Steve Sinnard beat Travis Aye. Bud Two Troy Auen beat Brock Jones. Auen was awarded closest to the pin on 8, low net and the longest putt on 9. Auen is headed to Des Moines Golf and Country Club to play in the member guest tourney this weekend. In fashionable style Captain Mike Franey birdied the last hole to beat Kevin K. Wittrock. The flying car dealer drained a putt on #7 from the West edge of Glidden for par. Wittrock was spouting off as he stood on the 6th tee knowing that he was getting a shot to go along with the blistered tee ball that he hit. Sorry Mr. Wittrock, Bud Light nation took over and propelled us to victory. Mike Schulz has been cleared by your Bud Light medical staff and will return to action next week. Your Bud Light team sits tied in third with Family Specialty Medical and just one point behind Supper league's hottest team Carpet One.

For the second straight week Carpet One posted a shut out as they blanked the league's most famous couple....the farmer and the dog.

A tough night for the Dog!

On the range reporters recorded Papa Joe Pick talking trash about how he could not understand how a team would get shut out. Whooooops Mr. Pick...can you say open mouth and insert foot! The entire Carpet One team was awarded low net team and low net players.....Brad Hempstead, Coling Bierl, Jon Sturm and Easy Ed Vanderheiden. The farmer and the dog even got into the action of low net as there were 9 players equaling the best net score of the night. Produce Tom Duff was the pig for the Mid Iowa Team. The carpets are 8 behind the guns of Volquartsen Custom.

The league leaders and defending champions stumbled in week 10 and tied the glass slivers of Carroll Glass. Casket Kyle Atkinson led the way with a two under 35 on the front. It appears that married life has not caught up with Kyle yet. Cable Chad Kanne beat John Deere Green Benton Snyder. Keith Pottebaum was the only winner for the glass company beating Boomer Lechtenberg.

Family Specialty Medical ruined the reception of Pat Macke and the Verizon Wireless cell phones. The only winner for the phones was Karl Christensen. League sources tell this publisher that this may be Karl's first win of the season. Chemical Dirk Glynn, Mortgage Man Ryan Milligan and Jamie North beat Pat Macke, Brandon Vonnahme and Wyatt Haukap. North was one of the nine low netter.

Computer Concepts blanked Fleggard 10 to 0. Fleggard was a no show.

Champion Ford is leading the way with a 8 to 2 win over Linde Equipment. Digger Dave Nelson, Clothier Wade Wilkie and Steve Herrin were all winners for the motor company.Herrrin and Jair Mayhall shared low net honors. Mayhall was closest to the pin and Herrin nailed the longest putt. Rowdy Ron Juergens put Monument Man Loren Boyce six feet under to the post the only win for the equipment dealers. The golf report satellite images have revealed that the Monument Man was in the sand three times on #10.

Ag Venture struggled for back to back weeks losing to the most mature team Stiff Sticks. The sticks were led by Fairway Frank Comito and Doc Sporrer. Long pants Nick Schon beat Floridian Randy Hockom and Magic Mike Nelson tied Neal Cross.

Highway 30 Car Wash bounced back from a 1 to 9 loss last week to beat Community Oil 8 to 2. Jazzy Jeff Minnich, Randall Road Randy Bierl and Car Wash Todd Pettitt were all winners. Car wash was low gross. Todd Kanne was the only winner for the oil jobbers. Where was Chico Kanne?

The King of Beers took care of the Carroll Cycle Center despite be without the leadership of Fred Dolezal. The legend Joel Harris was the only loser for the beers at the hands of Jamming Joe Hinners. After this most recent loss for the shot put champion trade rumors have begun to surface. John Greteman and Counter top Pat Malloy beat head hog Terry Ruchti and Corey Bluml. Tom Farner and Willey's only golf pro Paul Tigges.

Feld Security secured a 10 to 0 beating of Byronz Boys. Tiger Tom Simons, Numbers Bob Muhlbauer and Ron Bubba Badding were all winners.

The Uncle Bruce Players of Week goes out to the entire Carpet One Team!

Terry Ruchti was on the winning member guest team at the Effingham Country Club this past weekend. Several Carroll area golfers participated in the event. This report received a call from an Effingham bartender inquiring if we had a large mouth bass at our club. I told her that our ponds at the club had almost no water and very few fish. She went on to inform me that we have a vertically challenged golfer at our club whose lips were constantly moving over the weekend but nothing was coming out hence the name large mouth bass. All this report can uncover is that his partner's name was Donkey. Anyone with knowledge of this situation should contact the local authorities. It seems like we have a real jewel on our hands!